Category: Patents

The P.I.S.O.R. patent repository is a collection of unusual, archaic and truly bizarre patents. In combing through these patents, The Institute has been amazed by the combination of meticulous legal language and detailed (and often beautiful) patent diagrams. Language like “to prevent cannibalism and related vices” from an anti-pecking device for chickens is, to the Institute, a public poetry of the highest order. Images link back to the original patent for further reading and exploration.

Santa Claus Detector. Patent number: 5523741 Issue date: Jun 4, 1996

“Thus, in the minds of young children, Santa Claus’ arrival is denoted by the presence of Christmas presents under the tree and/or Christmas stockings filled with treats. However, none of these customary practices, nor any prior art arrangements known to applicant, provides a Christmas stocking which is capable of being selectively illuminated to signal the arrival of Santa Claus. Furthermore, there are no such prior art arrangements known to applicant which includes a light transmissive three dimensional hollow recognizable character rendition which is capable of being illuminated to signal the arrival of Santa Claus. ”

Drink collecting device. Jun 24, 1930 (1767820)

“This is particularly useful as the production of the intoxicating liquor sold at the trial is much more satisfactory as evidence than is oral evidence of an agent that he bought and consumed liquor at a certain time, open as it is to all the attacks against oral testimony and to the further attack that an agent who consumes a considerable quantity of liquor in the course of a day is liable to impeachment as a witness on the ground that he was likely intoxicated and therefore his testimony is not to be believed.”

Artificial Electrical Ejaculator. Apr, 12 1960 (2932297)

“Breeders of animals sometimes have trouble with their charges because of the lack of sufficient interest of the latter in the matter of sexual conduct, especially on the part of males. This happens among animals of the rodent class and is a source of anxiety on the part of the breeders seeking to increase their flocks or groups. To overcome this and to get more definite results; this invention of an electrical nature has been developed. The invention primarily consists of an electrode applicable into the rectum of a male animal and forming one side of a circuit while the other electrode to complete this circuit is made to contact the areas closest to the testicles. Then to provide adequate excitement and spasmodic muscular reactions, voltage varying from 100 volts to 1800 volts (depending on the class of animal involved) is intermittently applied. This application is continued until the semen is emitted or ejaculated and collected in a suitable container. The semen is then injected as required into a female of the same species when she is in heat to make her conceive.”

TOY OR NOVELTY HAT. Nov. 1, 1960 (2958156)

“This seat (14) represents, and is intended to simulate in the imagination of the user of the toy, a space station or launching pad for the sattelite (B) and to lend to the appearance or to the aura of space travel and its paraphernalia the rim of the hat (10) is formed with a ring (15) of larger diameter connected to the hat by spokes.”

Grave Alarm. Jun 20, 1893 (500072)

“The dirt or soil is then filled in as usual. It will be seen that the cord extends down into the coffin, and in case the supposed corpse should have been in a trance, and not dead, when regaining consciousness can grasp the cord and sound an alarm. At the same time fresh air will be admitted to the coffin through the tubes, whereby life may be sustained until help comes. ”